Why I Love...(PART 2)

...pulp fiction. (The genre, not the movie...I'm making up for not posting in a while.)

The reason I love pulp novels is simple: it's about bad-ass dudes and broads doing bad-ass stuff in a seedy, nasty world. That and because "The Invisible Millionaire" from Follow the Saint by Leslie Charteris gave us this fabulous line:

"To compare it to the face of a gorilla which had been in violent contact with a variety of blunt instruments during its formative years would be risking the justifiable resentment of any gorilla which had been in violent contact with a variety of blunt instruments during its formative years."

That's great stuff only a classic character like The Saint can get away with.

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Why I Love...

Photo Source

Pop-up books! (Man it's been I while since I've done one of these...)

Seriously though, who didn't like pop-up books? It made reading fun. Pulling out tabs that made a dog's tail wag. Entire forest scenes popping up from the page. Pop-up books were an interactive adventure story. But the best part is: it's not just for kids.

The world of book and paper arts just makes things even better. There are some absolutely amazing paper artists who just make me green with envy. Even the Smithsonian Libraries have dedicated a portion of their blog to it. There's even a Movable Book Society!

I mean, come on! Look at this and tell me it's not cool:

Source

Exactly. You can't! Check out some of the other posts on the SILS blog, some amazing stuff on this French website, and this NPR piece about Robert Sabuda and his Alice pop-up. Really good stuff to say the least.

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Top 5 Best Degrassi Couples

Of all my obsessions (Miley lovin', Twilight-hatin', Disney rantin', etc) I've somehow neglected to give props to my all time favorite show ever in the history of forever and my constant #1: Degrassi: The Next Generation. Me and Degrassi go way back. I first discovered the show in it's 3rd season and was immediately enraptured by its Canadian-ness and perfect grasp of campy, teen drama. After catching up on seasons 1 & 2, I've kept up with the show ever since and have even become hooked on it's predecessors, Degrassi Junior High and Degrassi High. (Which are so late-80s/early 90s it's beautiful. *tear*)


Degrassi sucks now, no lie. Well, it's not that bad but it's pretty bad. Either way, I still watch it because it's my best friend and time apart equals a broken heart. The second half of Season 9 is due sometime soon (...I hope?) so I thought I'd celebrate by listing my top 5 favorite Degrassi couples EVA.

5. Sellie (Sean and Ellie)

Blasphemy, I know. In the Holy Church of Semma, Sellie is the devil. But I must put aside my prejudices and give props to the writers for this one. After the heartbreak of seeing Emma and Sean split, I wasn't too happy with seeing Ellie move in on my Emma's man. And I always thought Sean was too good for Ellie's whiny ass.

But, even though I don't like Ellie, I think they made a decent couple. They both had pretty effed up home lives (Ellie: drunk mom, Sean: non-existent/drunk parents) and a good deal of personal problems (Ellie: cutter. Sean: anger problems, Candy Bandit). So in terms of two tortured souls having each other to lean on, they worked out quite well. They were also actually kinda cute sometimes (BARF) and Sean seemed extra sweet while he was with her.

Like most high school relationships, this one ended after some psycho shot up the school and Sean, having saved the day in a tragic way (RHYMES!), feels the need to go cry in his soup at this parents' house leaving Ellie stuck on her own with the rent. You go, Sean. I mean, aw, how sad for Ellie.
:)

4. Palex (Paige and Alex)

Ya know, I liked Palex mostly cuz I liked Alex but also because it was Degrassi's first, and only lesbian relationship. First of all, Degrassi's proved they suck at gay relationships. Just look at Marco. Poor Marco. When he was struggling with his sexuality it made for some really good episodes (See: Pride). But when they tried to hook him up, it never worked. But we'll talk about that later. One reason I think Palex worked so well is because it wasn't about two girls that liked each other, it was about two people who liked each other.

I really like that Degrassi wasn't just trying to get us all hot and heavy with some vapid girl-on-girl action. Paige and Alex had genuine concern for each other's well-being and were there for each other during the tough times (anxiety attacks and stripteases). It's always nice to have someone standing by to remind you not to suck.

Like all of the other relationships on my list, Palex had some good relationship development. Their courtship is pretty random but it if you think back to the saga of the Paige and Alex friendship then they make some sense.

However, the good times quickly faded when new-Alex magically became old-Alex and was booted off the Degrassi island. Sadness. She now spends her days with Kendra and Manny's imaginary brother looking for the secret portal back to Degrassi-land.

3. Crash & Cranny (Craig and Ashley/Manny)

Ok, I'm kinda cheating (like Craig) but I honestly can't choose in the Crash v. Cranny debate. I guess I lean more towards Crash because they seem to make a bit more sense than Craig and Manny. For one, both Craig and Ashley are self-involved, morbid drama-queens. They are Lindsay Lohan and a pair of leggings; they just go together. And even though Craig seemed to take over Degrassi after a while (seriously, most of seasons 3 & 4 were all about Craig) the drama that was Crash was usually quite entertaining. Plus I've always liked how they got together. It was a good character development point for Ashley.

As for Cranny, I guess they were kinda cute but only because Manny was adorable and naive with her slutty, little self. They also brought the drama in a major way with Manny's pregnancy/abortion storyline, which is one of Degrassi's finer episodes. Even though I didn't mind when Crash 2.0 came around circa mid-season 4, Cranny 2.0 (Season 5 into Season 6) was just unnecessary and a bit contrived.

For me, Crash and Cranny are a package deal because separately they just aren't enough to earn my eternal love. But together they are a thing of teen drama beauty. The whole Craig/Ashley/Manny ordeal was TNG's first crack at the love triangle. They've done it many times since and they all reek in comparison to the epic-ness that is Craig, Manny and Ashley.

2. Jaitlin (Joey and Caitlin)

Joey and Caitlin are actually a remnant of DJH and DH. In fact, Joey and Caitlin are sorta the Sean and Emma of their time. You had two opposites: Joey, the classic underachiever and Caitlin, the fight-for-your-rights, let's-protest-everything chick. I guess I should say that Sean and Emma are the Joey and Caitlin of their time. My bad.

Even though they never seemed to be able to work things out (Joey was usually the one screwing things up) you were still rooting for them, mostly because both had extremely luscious hair...And also because, like Semma (see below), you saw two people who were so different from each other but had the chemistry and loving feeling for a relationship. You really just wanted them to work things out. But nooooo, Joey just had to FCUK Tessa Campinelli. (I really, truly, and honestly suggest you watch DJH and DH)

Anyway, they had a good but brief run on TNG and even though I can't for the life of me remember how it happened, I'm sure their break up was somehow Kevin Smith's fault. :(

1. Semma (Sean and Emma)

I guess you should have figured out by now that my #1 Degrassi couple consists of Sean Cameron and Emma Nelson. Now, the Semma I'm referring to is the one that began in Season 1, took a break at the end of the season, was resurrected in Season 2 and then died in Season 3. As far as I'm concerned, Season 6 Semma did not exist because it was an absolute abomination. But, I digress.

Semma 1.0 is probably Degrassi's only good "opposites attract" relationship. (I wouldn't count Spinner and Darcy since Spinner was trying to be good. And Johnny and Alli? Blech.) Unlike a lot of Degrassi's later relationships, this one actually had some development and didn't just fall out of the sky. Also, it was an example of Degrassi using it's relationships for character growth which we got a lot of for both Emma and Sean.

Like I said before, Sean and Emma, like Joey and Caitlin, were coming from two very different places in life and yet they still seemed to make some sense. I guess they each offered what the other was lacking; a little loosening up for Emma and a bit of structure and direction for Sean. And they were very, very cute in the beginning. Seriously though, how adorable is their first kiss?? And their first date??? And when they danced at the school dance??? Awww, they were too cute.

But, if you think about it, Sean and Emma didn't really last that long. Their downfall was definitely the fact that they were so different and both too stubborn to compromise or try and understand each other. Ah well, they were good while they lasted.
-----
Honorable mentions: Spane (Spinner and Jane), Spaige (Spinner and Paige) and Jashley (Jimmy and Ashley)

ciao!

P.S. - Look out for my Top 5 Worst Degrassi Couples and Top 5 Best Worst Degrassi Couples, coming soon to a theater near you.
P.P.S. - I <3 Joey Jeremiah.

Ain't none of these pictures mine, yo.
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Why I Love...

...The Original "We Are the World"

Ok, so I don't love "We Are the World". I've honestly never really been a fan of the song. But I do like it much better than "We Are the World 25". The song is a tad bit corny but you can't completely hate it because 1) it's for Mother Africa and 2) it's so damn catchy. Oh and 3) in the video MJ is rockin' this jacket: 



That's a nice jacket. I want that jacket.* Anyway, the original trumps the new one on many levels. Let's take a look. TO THE LIST MAKING MACHINE! [Insert old school Batman transition here]

1. Musicians v. "Musicians"
The original "We Are the World" is most well-known for it's superstar cast. It was written by music superhero Micheal Jackson alongside fellow Motown legend, Lionel Richie and produced by the-one-and-only Quincy Jones. Throw all the other humongous names in there and you've got the highest quality ingredients for a charity single hit. One of the problems with the new one is that most of the performers don't matter. Everyone's gonna remember the name Diana Ross for years to come. But who's gonna remember Nicole Schrzinger? (You don't know who that is, do you?) Or Justin Beaver? Or Joe Jonas? Nobody, that's who.

Also, this might just be because I'm out of the loop, but I didn't recognize half of the people there. Who were those people? If they're gonna make a charity single they better put in some of the few people I know like The Gaga and Queen B. (As long as they don't sing "Video Phone" *shudder*)

Lastly, Lil' Wayne? Really??? Not only was it an insult to actual singers who could've had that line but it was also an insult to Bob Dylan who I hear is like, really famous or something.

2. "Leave your ego at the door"
It's said that 25 years ago Quincy Jones told everyone to drop their egos off with a babysitter for the night but I guess ego babysitting is an 80s phenomenon because people seem to have brought theirs along this time.

Ok, so there's actually no evidence of egoism here. From what I hear, Barbra Streisand was the only one who threw a diva fit. But there's something over-processed about WATW 25. Maybe it's because I'm more aware of the beast that is celebrity and how it is usually skips hand-in-hand with huge egos these days. Everyone just seems so glammed up and shiny. Which is what I would've expected from the 80s WATW considering most of those people were just coming from the AMAs. But nope, everyone seemed rather cozy in their WATW sweatshirts. No, "I'm ready for my close-up" hair and make-up.

3. We're so concerned
Man, the beginning with J. Hud and what's-her-face from the Pussycat Dolls (that Nicole chick you don't know) is so full of "look how concerned I am" face that I almost fainted from the overload. I don't disagree that the situation in Haiti is a grave one so people probably shouldn't be having tickle-fights and dancing on tables. But, everyone in WATW 25 seems so aware of what they're doing and it kinda ruins it. I guess, with the legacy of the original hanging over your head it's hard to not know the sort of impact that you could be making. So, I'll give them that. But there's a whole different vibe coming from WATW #1. Everyone seems to be having a good time and there's a real sense of hope as opposed to the morbidity and "This is serious, guys" attitude of WATW 25.

WATW looks like a bunch of people just recording a charity single while WATW 25 looks like a bunch of people recoding a charity single for a music video.

4. Not enough adorableness
Where are the cute people in WATW 25??? WATW had Paul Simon looking adorable with his bad haircut. It had Cyndi Lauper looking adorable with her multi-colored hair and baby face. It had Willie Nelson looking adorable in a "I'm kinda confused" way.

In fact, it's missing a lot of things: big hair (Diana Ross), shoulder pads (LaToya Jackson), mullets (Steve Perry), blind piano players (Stevie and Sir Ray Charles) and Kenny Rogers. At least they kept The Jacket. Good job, guys.


Verdict: Well, there's not much of a verdict; I already said I liked the first one better. Allow me to demonstrate through music math: Tina Turner + Bruce Springsteen + Billy Joel + Diana Ross (- The Supremes) x Ray Charles = Awesome Overload while Miley Cyrus + Justin Beaver** + The Jonas Brothers (- King Kevin) x Lil' Wayne = Kinda Alarming

All in all, I guess the final "verdict" is that WATW 25 lacks the musical prowess and charm of the original. Everything's too glossy and glamorous visually while sonically (whoa!) it sounds disjointed, esp. with the rap bit. I honestly think they should've just hired R. Kelly to churn out one of his famous choir-backed anthems and just left WATW alone. But, it was for charity so I can't hate too much. I'll just be in this corner quietly sipping my haterade.

ciao, muchachos 

*So, I did some research and that jacket (along with the gloves on the cover of the Bad album) are being housed at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Annex in NYC. I'm thinking we get a group together and go steal it? Let me know! 
**I wish his name really was Justin Beaver because then he'd be a real Canadian.

"Why isn't it ever over when she says, 'ciao!'" you ask. I don't know, I really don't.
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I'm Still Bitter: So Weird

One of the best parts about getting old is being bitter and annoying about things from the past that can't be changed. I figure, since I just turned 20, that I should just go ahead and start early.

What am I bitter about today? So Weird. Not the show itself, of course. But rather the sucky third season. You know me and Disney are always in a war - an imagined war - but a war nonetheless. And it seems that Disney can do no right lately because, well...they can't. (No one, and I mean NO ONE who greenlights Camp Rock 2 can ever do right again. It's not in line with the laws of the universe.)

In case you don't know, So Weird was a tv show that aired on the Disney channel way back in 1999. It was about a girl named Fi[ona] (Cara DeLizia) who traveled the country with her rocker mom (Mackenzie Phillips), her brother Jack and some other random people who don't really matter. Oh, except for Eric von Detten who always matters. Anyway, Fi would always run into supernatural occurrences (little girls who were werewolves, aliens, time warps) that helped her connect with her deceased father who was also into exploring the supernatural. Yeah, deep stuff.

When Season 2 of So Weird ended, the show was getting in there. Season 2 was pretty dark, for a Disney show that is. It dealt primarily with Fi finding out that her dad, like her, dabbled in the supernatural. She also finds out this was probably the cause of his death. In the season finale, Fi discovers that her dad's twin sister receives messages from him in her sleep. Fi has some encounter with a demon on a roof and is saved by the ghost of her father. I mean, this really is deep stuff, guys.

Then season 3 comes around, Fi's gone and we're dealing with people getting sucked into pretty paintings. Um, whaaa? What seems to have happened is, even though the writers had a wicked sick third season planned, DeLizia left the show for whatever reason and Disney said "Uh, no" to what the writers had planned. So, DeLizia was replaced with Alexz Johnson (of Instant Star fame) and So Weird got itself a nice, light, happy! tone. Blech.

Now, I happen to like Alexz Johnson and I can't blame her for So Weird's demise. It's not her fault Fi upped and left. But I can blame Disney because I'm in a network blaming mood. *cough*NBC*cough*

If it wasn't for Even Stevens and, yes, even Lizzie McGuire, I would say this was the end of a Disney era. Disney hasn't had a kid-oriented drama since So Weird ended. (Even though it is dramatically bad, JONAS is not a drama, kiddos). Disney has never really been one to push the envelope but they've really given up lately.

Interestingly enough, So Weird is an earlier example of the "special teen" formula of which Disney is now so fond. Except, that time, they were doing it right. Hannah Montana, That's So Raven, JONAS, Sonny With A Chance...they are all so overplayed with their identical storylines and bad humor. Wizards of Waverly Place is actually pretty clever in my book (for another discussion). And Suite Life of Zack and Cody (not that "On Deck" sh*t) didn't pander too much to the "special teen" formula. Plus is was mildly funny when it first started. So Weird happened to be creative and entertaining. Also, the main focus wasn't "I'm a special teen who travels with her rock star mommy. I'm so special!" The show focused on cool supernatural folklore and legend and family dynamics. And it was more than just mindless entertainment churned out for annoying 10-year-olds. It looked like a lot of thought had gone into the never seen third season.

Season 3 of So Weird makes me bitter because it's largely representative of the growing hole in quality television for our precious 9-14 crowd. (Those are made up numbers y'all; I don't know Disney's target audience) Like I said before, I have to forgive the writers because the odds (aka Disney) were against them. But it just gives me more reason to want to give Mickey Mouse a good, swift kick to the gut.

Kids these days need what we had back in the 80s and 90s. Once upon a time kids' tv taught us how to enjoy our imaginations and find the excitement in the mundane of everyday lives instead of sitting around on our bums wishing we were famous pop stars or bad actors. (Yeah, I'm talking to you Nick J.)

And that, my friends, is why I am bitter.

ciao.

P.S. - Happy 18th Birthday, Taylor Lautner! If your parents love you, they've hired you an entourage of big, burly bodyguards and bought you a house with a reeaaalllyy high, electric fence...Enjoy!
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Why I Love...

...missing all the FANCY award shows.

First "Why I Love..." of 2010!! Excited??
(Don't be)
I'm enjoying not taking part in this year's award show season. I like to hold out for the more legit award shows like the MTV Movie Awards and the Kids Choice Awards, anyway.


Reason #1 I'm checking the absent box is because I find award shows unbearably boring. I don't blame Mariah for downing one too many at whatever award show that was. I, too, would have to partake in lots of free booze to be mildly interested at one of those things. Unless you have lots of money on Lord of the Rings or you're just hoping for some nip-slips, there isn't much going on in award shows that I can imagine an outside audience finding genuinely interesting. That's why I'm skipping all these high class award shows in the beginning of the year and holding out for the VMAs where the Evil English Clown talks about how he'd still do Gaga even if she was packing something extra. Low class = fun!


Reason #2 is because I haven't seen most of those movies, heard of most of those actors or despise most of those songs. As someone aspiring to find themselves somewhere within the entertainment realm, I might wanna work on the first two. But, for now, as a poor college student, I'm perfectly content with not shelling out $10 every week to gather that knowledge. As for the music, ugh, don't get me started.


Reason #3 is because award shows largely seem like a large pat on the back anyway. Who gets nominated is largely dependent on what kind of hold they have in their respective industries and how popular they are at the time. There are a ton of artists who've won lots of these big name awards (SAGs, Oscars, Grammys, etc) early in their careers when they were hot and popular but stopped getting them later in their careers even as they continued to do good work. Does this mean their later stuff sucked? Or is a "Record of the Year" Grammy more of a "Most Popular Record of the Year" award? I don't know, man. You tell me.

Oh well. I'm sure everyone has fun putting on their pretty, fancy dresses, strolling the red carpet and getting tons of free stuff. I'm not saying I wouldn't show up if I got nominated! I would def sit through a bunch of boring speeches if it meant I got a nice, shiny statue and a free watch :D

ciao!

P.S. - Funniest thing I've heard all week: In case you didn't know, tonight is The Grammys. (Yeah, I don't care either) Because Michael Jackson sadly checked out a couple months ago, the Grammy people are (finally?) giving him a Lifetime Achievement Award and they're paying tribute to him with some 3-D show or something. I don't know.

Anyway, there was a little rumor going around that his kids, The Three Ps, were going to sing at the Grammys. Ok, so it's not LOL-funny but, it is kinda funny that anyone would believe that three (grieving) kids, who have presumably never performed in their lives, would hop up on stage in front of millions and give us a show. Maybe I'm just silly but the thought of that being believable makes me giggle.

Soooo...let me know how the show goes. Ya know, who's terrorizing Ms. Swift, what crazy outfit Lady Gaga is wearing and what the Jackson 3 sing. I hope they sing this song.

P.P.S. - The Three Ps (presumably, Prince, Prince II and Paris) makes me think of Ed, Edd and Eddy. I never liked that show...

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Remember when I used to post stuff?

Yeah me neither, but look crochet stuff! So this will be a quick post. I made this little guy, using this pattern, for a friend's birthday about a month after her birthday. I didn't follow the directions for the eye and just sort of made it up as I went, but since the other instructions we're good, I'm sure the ones for the eye are as well. It's still sitting in my living room. I'll mail it. One day. Soon. Hopefully.
I also made a crochet hair band for another friend (which I didn't take a picture of. And I also have to mail. One day. Soon. Hopefully) based on this design but tweaked a tad to make it continuous. This lady (who is funny enough located where my friend is...) has some other beautiful designs (including these hand warmers which I made but didn't take picture of, to go with a teal version of this hat which I made but did not take a picture of, that was for the same person as this cuttlefish a teal version of which I made but didn't take a picture of, using a pattern I bought from Hansi Singh on Etsy, the same person who wrote Amigurumi Knits which has an octopus pattern in it which I DID take a picture of but never posted, and also has a pattern for a Loch Ness Monster I didn't take a picture of. You see a pattern no?)
That's all I got. Sorry. I'll work on getting some other stuff to write about. Now that Conan's gone I don't know what to do with myself. Maybe post more?

***EDIT***

I found the octopus picture:

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